VROOM VROOM DER PARTAY STATAR

Ross and I are planning a trip to Oslo and Stockholm. I really want to also go to Helsinki and Estonia and Copenhagen too...cuz I probably won't go to Scandinavia again. I'm looking for hostels online, and keep finding reviews like this one:

"Ok so this place wasn't a hostel, but wasn't a hotel. You can book a dorm for six people but you need to have six people. Makes sense doesn't it. Not really. The rooms were comfortable and the showers fairly new and plentyful. Other than that the hotel/hostel put out bad vibes from the start. This is a huge place with over four hundred rooms yet there wouldn't have been more than thirty people in the place. If you dont mind having hundreds of hookers hassling you and asking you for sex literally as soon as you leave the front door then this place is for you. If you also dont mind seeing old men bring hookers back to the place and having them roam the hallways then it is ok. Unfortunately, it wasn't ok for me and made my stay very uncomfortable. If you do stay here be very careful at night. I mean very careful. I nearly got beaten up by a pimp for turning down a hooker."

And this one:

"We stayed here for five nights in July 2006. The boat was a good place to stay -- tasty breakfast and clean accommodation and the staff were friendly and helpful. It was also a very central location. However to get to the boat, most afternoons and evenings we had to walk past several drug users cooking up and injecting drugs just outside the building directly opposite MS Innvik. They were not threatening in any way but it was not pleasant to see. In the morning we would walk by their used, bloodied needles left lying around -- I definitely wouldn't want to bring children here to stay. It's a shame as it ruined our stay a little."

I hope Ross plans on being not only my cousin/travelling partner, but also my bodyguard.