Why oh Why do they always sit me next to the Fartinest Farter on the plane?

I just had to endure 3 hours of intermittently finding out exactly what was going on inside my neighbor's colon.  EW.

We had a nice chat, however and he explained that he's a Canadian, but living in India for about 6 months out of the year in a town called "Auraville".  It's mostly US and British expats who sit around and meditate and love eachother and whatnot.  He did mention that he really regrets not having traveled more as a younger person and I did take away from the conversation that yes, it is better to be traveling around the world now then to have waited until I retired.  Also I stole the airline map out of the on board magazine so I can stare at countries while I wait for my connecting flight to Singapore.  But instead I found free internet and a scrumptious meal.  Curry Potato Toast and coffee.  The price on the menu was 10 whatever-they-have's in Kuala Lumpur.  I don't know the exchange rate since I'm only here for about an hour, but I decided to throw caution to the wind.  My VISA receipt said $3.25 US.  Woo hoo!   Plus free internet and a comfy couch to sit on.

Oh, and I walked all the way into the men's bathroom.  All the way right up to the point where the men standing and peeing turn around and look at you with confusion (my hair is quite short at the moment) before I realized my mistake.  If I only had a square of toilet paper for every time that happened in my life, I wouldn't have had to use dirty old money in that ol' McDonald's in Rome a few years back.  On the way out of there, I laughed and laughed so that all the men going in would see that I KNEW what I did, and it was all just a big misunderstand and see how funny life can be sometimes?  And then I saw the universal symbol for men, you know the little man in pants.  To my left and right and above the doorway.