Bed Wetter

So I wasn't a Bed Wetter. (Even though I erroneously admitted to it one time).

But that doesn't mean I never "wet the bed".

Take that time I was 12, for instance. Sleeping over at my friend Maija's cabin. I've explained my relationship with Maija, haven't I? Well, one night we stayed up WAY too late laughing and drinking Mountain Dew.

I woke up somewhere early-morning and realized I had accidentally peed in Maija's bed. At age 12. While Maija was sleeping peacefully in the bed next to me. What would you do in a situation like that? I'll tell you what I did: I froze. I panicked. I lied.

I snuck out of the bed and changed my underwear and pretended to be asleep when she woke up and inquisitively asked what the HUGE, YELLOW wet spot was in between us. I was just as confused as she was. Was it sweat? Maybe...hmmm...it's doesn't smell like sweat...etc etc etc.

We decided to wash the sheets before her mom found out.

I threw my underwear in the machine when she wasn't looking.

The perfect crime.